The
Indians asked their Chief in autumn if the winter was going
to be cold or not. Not really knowing an answer, the chief
replies that the winter was going to be cold and that the
members of the village were to collect wood to be prepared.
Being
a good leader, he then went to the next phone booth and called
the National Weather Service and asked, "Is this winter
to be cold?"
The
man on the phone responded, "This winter is going to
be quite cold indeed."
So
the Chief went back to speed up his people to collect even
more wood to be prepared. A week later he called the National
Weather Service again, "Is it going to be a very cold
winter?"
"Yes",
the man replied, "it's going to be a very cold winter."
So
the Chief goes back to his people and orders them to go and
find every scrap of wood they can find. Two weeks later he
calls the National Weather Service again: "Are you absolutely
sure that the
winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely,"
the man replies, "the Indians are collecting wood like
crazy!"
Q: Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman than
a regular one?
A:
You have to hollow out the head.
A bird was flying south for Winter, but he had left it too
late and was frozen solid in a storm.
He dropped down into a pasture of cows. The biggest, fattest
cow was doing a crap there, and the bird landed in it. At
first he was disgusted, until he realised the poo was thawing
him out!
He started crying out for joy as the ice melted. A cat that
was nearby heard the cries, walked over, saw the bird and
ate it
There
are three morals to this story:
1.
Not everyone who gets you into shit is your enemy
2.
Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3.
If you are in shit, keep your mouth shut
Peekaboo Street (the US Olympian) apparently came into a lot
of money
because of her Olympic performance this winter. Rather than
spend it
on herself, she showed a lot of character by donating it to
a local
hospital. The primary facility the hospital needed was a retrofit
of
the Intensive Care Unit, so in her honor, the hospital board
is going
to name the new unit, "Peekaboo, I.C.U."
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