There
once was a man from Peru
Who had a lot of growing up to do,
He'd ring a doorbell,
then run like hell,
Until the owner shot him with a .22
There
once was a man from York
who picked his nose with a fork
when it got stuck
he cried "I don't give a fuck"
and walked around looking like a dork.
There
was a farting contest coming to town
and people came from miles around
the first fart was extremely loud
the second fart pleased the crowd
the third fart, the judges cried
"He shit his pants, he's disqualified!"
There
once was a man from kanass
Who's nuts were made out of brass
in stormy weather
he'd clack them together
and lightning shot out of his ass
I
once knew a person named Burl
Whose looks would make you hurl
why do I say it?
I'm not full of shit
this thing was half boy and half girl.
There
was an old lady from Wheeling,
who had a funny feeling
she laid on her back,
and tickled her crack
and pissed all over the ceiling
There
once was this guy named Stan
Who had some trouble being a man
He wore a dress and high heels
And drove a Chevrolet with pink wheels
And soon Stan became a tran
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